As the proverbial saying goes, experience is the best teacher. However, the painful experiences tend to teach better because they leave the deepest scars.
Above all, love exposes you to the most profound pain you can ever feel as a person. This is because you put your whole self in the open for your partner to see who you are. The pain involved with love consists of rejection, manipulation, abuse, and even cheating.
These painful encounters can break a person making them never love and trust again. However, another shot at love is not a bad idea because we all deserve to love and be loved. Meeting such a person entails meeting all their wounds.
Because they deserve love, how do you love a man who’s been hurt before?
Give Them Time
A hurt man who is more careful with his heart needs to take things slower. Therefore, instead of pushing him to reciprocate your rate in the relationship, it would be best to give him time.
It is normal to build walls after an abusive relationship. For such a person to love you appropriately, you should allow him time to bring down the walls gradually. Besides, there’s no worse relationship when you try loving someone with fresh wounds from a past relationship.
Giving people time to take things slowly has never gone wrong.
Listen When They Speak
Sometimes, people feel as though talking about their past abusive relationships with the current partner is wrong. However, you need to lend an ear to such a person. Speaking out what he’s bottled up in a long time helps him relieve some bit of pain, especially if someone is willing to listen.
Even though opening up about the painful past can seem like a vulnerable move, you need not shy away from the opportunity to open up.
Moreover, the chances are that people speaking about their pain do not want you to fix anything but listen and perhaps share eye-opening advice.
Subsequently, please do not sit there quietly as it gets creepy. Instead, show him that you’ve heard them by responding. You can do that by asking questions he is comfortable answering or telling him you can imagine how tough it was to go through such encounters.
Treat Them Better
To clarify things, in no way should you manipulate or lie to a man who’s been hurt, pretending to treat him better. If that’s your motive, kindly leave the relationship not to deepen his wounds.
Otherwise, if his pain shows you that he deserve better, then be the best he has ever had. Reassure him of his good looks even if his ex-girlfriend made him feel ugly. Also, be there even though all he knew is neglect and abandonment. Even better, could you support him in his dreams and goals?
However, saying is not enough; keeping your promises will do much better in his healing process. Besides, only your actions will show him that you are different from others.
Generally, it would help if you were ready to accept all about the person; past, present, and future. His past involves his tears and painful memories, present working towards healing and loving you back, and his future that comes with his dreams and aspirations.
